August 27, 2009

The Ubernit

As I have been away for most of the month, I have not been able to play much poker, so no brag (or cry-baby) graph this month as too little volume. I may in fact stop posting monthly graphs as I am not sure if they help or hinder. We’ll see. Thought I might have some more fun with my thoughts on player types instead. So…..

Mr Ubernit

Hey, we’ve all done it, so no denials.

Stared down at AA from UTG after ages of folding, licked our lips as we consider our sexy graph after this hand, raise the appropriate amount, and wait for those fish to come on board. Actually the only one who calls is that pesky LAG from the button. Well, who cares, its time to teach that guy a lesson, and me and my bullets are here to do just that.

Flop is all low cards. Grrrreat. Continuation bet time. Great again, he calls. Turn another low card, bet again. What? He min raises. That git is trying to bluff me. Well not this time buddy you say, as you hit the All-in button. The rest is a blur, as all you remember is seeing the mountain of chips shipping in the other direction. WHAT A BAD BEAT……..

This is usually one’s early hard lessons in cash games deep stacked (so that’s why they short stack…NB I will be adding the SerialShortstacker to my player types soon, although I am a bit scared of the wrath I might get from that particular community when I do, yikes) and after a few times we learn to lose less than the maximum and start to get better. The skill in these pots is losing the minimum, cos you will always lose a fair chunk of your stack.

The ubernit cannot learn this lesson, and loses stack after stack with his premiums, and never gets paid off with his sets. He runs at somewhere around 11/4 at full ring and at 14/8 at 6max. when the ubernit raises, he turns his cards face up (AA-JJ, AK and maybe AQ if late pos) I have seen some even limp JJ treating it as a set mine or check call on low cards. TT downwards is open limp. When the ubernit calls a raise he has JJ and below, or poss AK-AQ. The ubernit wont 3bet QQ from the blinds at FR,and only 3bets JJ+ at 6max from blinds, never bluffing. When the ubernit calls on any board he has either an overpair or a set. If an ubernit hits a straight or flush, it’s always by accident.

Ubernits never ever use the chat boxes.

Ubernits usually come from some weird city or country that noone has ever heard of, and have really unimaginative screen names like Karl66 or Wjke.

Ubernits always play with a full stack, and insta rebuy when busted.(which is often)

Watch as all but the superdonks insta fold when the ubernit raises any flop or turn.

The implied odds that we so romanticise about exist in abundance against the ubernit, and calling with any pp or suited connector is where its at against them, because if you hit you are getting their stack. I even call sometimes with something like a3o, knowing if I hit A3x with them on AK-AQ they are giving me their stack, and they are snap check folding with KK. If I don’t hit the 2 pair, even on an A rag flop, it’s me who is insta folding.
One word of warning, never ever EVER try to bluff the ubernit. I speak from bitter experience.

I have many many nice examples of this player type in action if anyone wants me to post them.

My fav type of player by far.

1 comment:

  1. more please. it's a sin to get stacked by the ubernit. I should be soundly beaten for my sins...

    * What about the 20/5 types - what kind of minds do they have? Have they ever read ANY poker theory? Ever?
    * The 50/10 - open limping AA from UTG (bastids)
    * The 35/20 - who loves to 3-bet defend and squeeze at every opportunity?
    * The 25/20 who loves to demonstrate the power of the TAG game